Panic erupted at a nursery today when a child scrawled some of Paul Gadd's Lyrics on the front of a Christmas card intended for his father. The message "Have a rock and roll Christmas" was spotted by an eagle eyed support worker and Social Services were tipped off. They arrived within 3 minutes (as per government guidelines) and had a court order to have the child taken into care before their parents arrived to collect them at lunchtime.
The parents of the child were arrested at the scene and are facing numerous charges. The police have raided their home and removed a number of CDs and computers to help with their investigation. It is expected that once they are found guilty they will have to sign the sex offenders register.
The head of the playgroup, Petunia Islington-Smythe, spoke to journalists about the harrowing events of the day. "We were warned that the family was dangerous" she said "but we never realised that they were actively exposing their children to paedophiles. We shudder to think of what emotional damage might have been done to the other young people in our care."
"We have made arrangements for counselling sessions for all the children, and their families, who attend our learning facility to help them through this difficult time. Being exposed to paedophilia can be deeply disturbing and we will offer all the support we can."
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2 comments:
dude you should write for a paper!
Very funny take on a ridiculous story. Thank you.
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