how not to order fast food #2

When the employee taking your order for fast food asks you the same question a second time it is usually because your first answer was woefully inadequate.

Do not, therefore, reply "I'm easy"

how not to order fast food #1

When you are ordering fast food and the employee serving you asks which drink you would like with the meal that you just ordered the correct answer is not "Yes please".

susan tedeschi at the 100 club

Good fun last night in London at the Susan Tedeschi gig. Matt Schofield was a guest for one song .. .. .. if only he'd played for more. The band are good but with him on stage they were even better as his ability brought them to life. If you get a chance to catch them while they're in the UK and you like blues/funk/rhythm and blues then go to hear Susan's powerful, soulful, emotional voice as it's worth the entry price.

mobile phone insurance: update

As you may remember mrsff was having some trouble with her mobile phone, in as much as it was broken, and she contacted T-Mobile to get it replaced under the expensive insurance policy she had been persuaded to take out at the beginning of her contract.

Having had no joy getting her phone replaced, and being given the run-around by both the insurer and T-Mobile, she cancelled the direct debit for the premiums. A very abrupt letter appeared a few days ago from the insurance company advising they have cancelled the policy and have deleted her bank details.

Imagine my amusement when a letter from Mike Kneafsey, Customer Services Director of T-Mobile arrived today about the cancelled policy.Without wishing to pre-empt her stinging response I can point out that the "48 hour phone replacement" is, in her experience, a complete and utter lie, rendering the worldwide protection clam totally invalid too. If I were you T-Mobile I'd stop digging a bigger hole for yourselves.

brighton pride

Brighton (gay) pride is this weekend. There are many road signs advertising this on the approach to the city. One of them stimulated my silly side and this was the result.

UPDATEd: After a conversation with my brother and his wife I've incorporated their suggestions:

lena gercke

There is trouble brewing for a German neo-nazi group who used an image of Lena in a billboard campaign promoting themselves. She abhors all they stand for and is furious that they've used her in their promotion.

executed for her own good

You might find it hard to believe but all of the major news sources are carrying, or have carried, the tale of Shaunetta the Sheep who has been stuck on a cliff ledge for over a month. After assessing the situation and deciding that any form of rescue attempt would put humans at risk the RSPCA shot her instead. Sky News says

The RSPCA feared the animal could bolt and injure those trying to save her. She had been stuck half way down the 220-foot cliffs between Whitby and Robin Hoods Bay for several weeks. RSPCA inspector Justin Le Masurier said they had been left with no choice to kill her. Sedating the animal with a tranquiliser dart could have caused her to become disoriented and fall off. "In the interests of its welfare, attempting a rope rescue on a 200ft cliff face would be too dangerous for the animal and for any rescue personnel," he said. "We understand the public's concern for the animal. It is sad sometimes but we took the difficult decision as it was in the interests of the animal."

RSPCA Inspector Justin Le Masurier thinks that execution is in the best interests of the animal?

cameron to raise VAT?

The Mirror is carrying a scoop by deputy political editor Jason Beattie that the Tories are secretly plotting to raise VAT to 20% when they win the election.

The move is revealed in a leaked letter sent to business bosses that sets out the party's agenda. It says a 5% rise in VAT is "very likely" if the Tories get into power.

5% rise? For a VAT rate of 20% to be a 5% rise then the general election would have to take place before 31st December 2009. On the 1st January 2010* the VAT rate returns to 17.5%.

Does Jason know something we don't?



*What a stupid idea to have a change in VAT on New Years Day. Even if shops don't change their prices all of their software, tills and accounting processes will need to be updated and corrected to reflect the new VAT rate. And what of pubs, bars and clubs? Do they have to raise their prices by 2.5% at midnight?

apocalypse brown

biodiversity falling

The BBC is reporting the findings of a team from Bournemouth University, Natural England and the Centre for Ecology and Hydrology (CEH) has carried out a study into biodiversity in British woodlands. On the one hand they find that human intervention on natural woodlands had a negative effect

They found that the soil was now more fertile than in the 1930s, which they said was a side-effect of the use of fertilisers.

while on the other hand they found that a lack of human intervention had a negative effect

One reason for this was thicker canopies, probably a result of the decline in traditional management techniques, such as coppicing.

tokyo*

The boys at BrewDog have got the Alcohol charities lining up to condemn their latest beer. There is a little discrepancy about the actual strength of the beer as their site quotes both 12% ABV and 14% ABV while the mortified article on the BBC site claims it's 18.2% ABV for the 330ml bottles.

Not unused to causing a stir this high end micro brewery produces an eclectic mix of niche beers that have catapulted them into the editorials of many newspapers as the mainstream struggles to understand the products they create. This latest offering should retail for around £9.99, a fact that seems to have been missed by the outpouring of concern from the Scottish arm of one of my most hated fakecharities, Alcohol Concern. For the BBC they said

Alcohol Focus Scotland chief executive Jack Law warned "It is utterly irresponsible to bring out a beer which is so strong at a time when Scotland is facing unprecedented levels of alcohol-related health and social harm. Just one bottle of this beer contains six units of alcohol - twice the recommended daily limit."

I guess that Jack hasn't heard about Scotland's most famous alcoholic produce then? You know, whisky, the drink that usually has a strength of 40% ABV which is twice that of this beer and is a great deal cheaper per unit of alcohol than this beer. Neither it seems has 'a spokeswoman' from the British Liver Trust who is reported to have said

"The notion of binge-drinking is to get drunk quick, so surely this beer will help people on their way?"

If getting drunk was your goal surely you'd choose the most cost effective route to achieve that rather than buying this expensive brew?

Where are Des Browne and Alex Salmond to stand up for this alcohol producer in Scotland?

serial bigamist escapes jail sentence

For being married to 5 men at the same time Emily Horne has received a suspended 10 month sentence.

The judge in the case, Judge Mushtaq Khokhar, called Horne a "manipulative woman" but decided not to jail her.

Rumours that he passed her a folded piece of paper with an invitation to supper after passing sentence are entirely unfounded.

is she filthy?

On Friday night one of my regular customers as they were leaving, and having had many conversations with me in the past so therefore knowing my sense of humour / level of perversion / love of the slightly unusual, suggested that I take a look at a website called isshefilthy? It is most definitely NSFW* so definitely do not click on the link if it could lead to trouble.












*Unless you have a particularly tolerant employer

green filter

Thank you Prodicus, your filter works a treat.

politicus jounalisticus

Spare a thought if you will for a moment for the lobby journalist (homo politicus journalisticus) This species faces severe hardship this summer as a predicted drought of stories for 12 weeks will drive them to the brink of survival. While the herds of ministers follow their annual migration pattern, flying out of London for 'fact finding missions' on exotic beaches, the politicus journalisticus is left in the empty halls of the palace of westminster fighting in packs over scant scraps of gossip and rumour. No private briefings, no personal tip-offs, no privileged access to support the politicus journalisticus in these lean months. Many fear that they may not survive to see the massed return of Ministers in the late Autumn.

Compare that to their cousins who write for the likes of Heat or Chat!(celebricus papparazea journalisticus) who positively thrive with the complex mating rituals of their target prey abundant during the summer months. With brightly covered plumage the celebrity shenanigans that they gorge on are in full swing during the primary rutting season. Half truths and innuendo can easily be padded out* by a blurred telephoto-lens shot of the alleged targets engaged in courtship.

But that, I suppose, is the way of natural selection. When one species struggles another expands and takes over their territory until the pendulum swings back again and the equilibrium point moves once more. We will have to wait until October to see how many of the politicus jounalisticus have survived the migration of Ministers and whether their numbers can be replenished ready for May next year.







*Rumour also has it that some of the plumage is artificially padded. Having not had any first hand experience, as it were, I cannot either confirm or contest the veracity of these claims.

summer holiday

Mrsff and the juniorff's headed off on their summer holiday this week. They've gone to visit friends in Canada for 3 weeks followed by a hop down to San Francisco for 6 days before returning home. The economic pressures of running a business, combined with other factors, have left me McCauley Culkin, a situation I'm not overly stressed about as I'll have plenty of things to do to keep me busy until they return.

Speaking to them via the miracle of Skype last night I got a bit angry though. When they landed in Canada mrsff received the third degree from immigration including the questions "Did their father give permission for them to travel?" and "Can you prove you are their biological mother?" Mrsff, slightly chuffed that they did not believe that she was a mother of three (Wii Fit does work!), was close to breaking point emotionally after a long day with three energetic offspring suggested that maybe they would like to confirm the answer to that second question with the children?

"That's not how we do things here m'am" came the reply.


My head knows that this approach to border control is sensible in an attempt to restrict the number of undesirables entering a country but that doesn't diminish my frustration at the way my family was treated.

tango with added tango (4)

the book of jonah (j r r tolkien translation)

Click for bigger

everybody welcome

From the Telegraph

A Church of England book published this week says they should be regarded as worshippers with "special needs" alongside the blind, the deaf, breast-feeding mothers, very short people and readers of tabloid newspapers.

Among those considered to warrant particular attention are people who are blind, deaf or in wheelchairs.

However, it also warns that bald people could be "in trouble from those overhead radiant heaters some churches have unwittingly installed" and that special arrangements may need to be made for people who are overweight.

"Some pew spaces and chairs are embarrassingly inadequate for what is known in church circles as 'the wider community'," the book says.

Consideration should be given to recovering alcoholics who want to receive communion wine, it suggests, and for those who "find loud noises from organs or music groups distressing".

The advice is part of an initiative launched this week to make churches more friendly and less intimidating to newcomers in an attempt to increase attendance at services.

What a patronising, PC, self loathing filled pile of bollocks. Tabloid newspaper readers have "special needs"? I'll leave it up to the ever eloquent Obnoxio to comment on that .. .. ..

Dude, seriously, WHAT THE FUCK??????????

No, really. What the fucking fuck?

hypertension

The BBC is reporting the results of research into hypertension funded by Cancer Research UK and carried out by a team from University College London. Three quotes from the article that, taken together, well .. .. .. here they are

GPs may be more likely to test blood pressure in people who were overweight.

One reason for the lack of diagnosis could be that smokers in the study tended to be thinner than those who did not smoke.

National guidelines advocate that doctors encourage those with high blood pressure to stop smoking and that greater effort should be made to look for signs of the condition in those who smoke.

It therefore follows that:

1) High blood pressure is more commonly suspected in people who are overweight.

2) Smokers tend to be thinner than non-smokers.

3) Smokers are encouraged to quit if found to have high blood pressure.

4) Quitting smoking may lead to increased weight.

5) see 1)

nanny lidl

The Part Timer Who Wears Comfortable Shoes (PTWWCS) was sent to Lidl today by her mother to buy some eggs. At the till she was told that they would not sell eggs to children aged 16 or under. "That's ok I'm seventeen" she (truthfully) replied. The cashier insisted on seeing proof of her age and as PTWWCS could not prove her age she was prevented from purchasing the eggs. She went to the next nearest supermarket (Iceland) and completed her mother's shopping requirements without further hindrance.

Last time I checked an egg has no sharp edges so I'm at a loss as to why Nanny Lidl thinks that the young should be prevented from purchasing them. Dangerous omelettes perhaps?

PTWWCS informs me that Nanny Lidl has attached a notice for staff informing them of her decision to every till station. I will investigate .. .. ..

i was listening to radio 6 this afternoon .. .. .. ..

Lauren Laverne was sitting in for Cerys Matthews and posed the question to listeners: "What small things make you happy?"

Derek contacted the show with this gem (around 1:26:10 on iPlayer)

I enjoy stopping that guy who undertakes everyone on the motorway from pulling out.

If anyone knows the Derek that sent that in then could you pass him this message for me?

Why do you think it is that the guy who was undertaking could undertake Derek? Is it because wankers like you refuse to drive in the driving lane? Is it because the middle lanes of the motorway are full of smug, self righteous cunts who aren't competent enough to actually change lanes on a motorway? The trouble with British roads is that they are full of petty minded tossers like you who think that because you can't get ahead then everyone else should be held back to make you feel better.

Norwich North by-election result

From wikipedia

The turnout(45.9%) was down from the 2005 general election (61.1%) and the Conservatives polled 2047 less votes but ran away with the result this time. The Labour vote collapsed from 21,097 (44.9% of the votes) in 2005 to 6,243 (18.2% of the votes) in 2009.






Results, results by candidate, labour lose norwich, conservative landslide, 5 losses for gordon, pass me a beer I'm thirsty, Libertarian gets 36 votes, geoff 'buff' hooooooooooooooon looked uncomfortable on question time last night, when will glasgow have their by-election?

taken for fuels

The BBC is reporting this morning a report by the Parliamentary transport committee who say

Inconsistency over justification for green taxes "tarnished their image"

"Fuel duty has been presented, at different times, as a tool to reduce carbon emissions, a source of general revenue, and a means to fund transport investment."

"The government handled a phased set of increases to Vehicle Excise Duty (car tax) so badly they tarnished the image of environmental taxes."

I read that as the committee is scared that the public no longer accept the bullshit reasons that politicians concoct whenever new taxes are being proposed. Maybe if y'all told the truth more often it would be less of a problem? Recently we had one Minister telling us on the same day that fuel tax will rise in the future to pay for 'green power' at the same time as another was calling for more help for households facing 'fuel poverty'. Back to that BBC report for this

The cross-party committee concluded that road users remained "an important source of revenue"

It also says car parking charges must be "proportional" and local authorities should not be charging excessive prices to pay for non-related services.

penalty fines must not be used as a "blatant" tool to raise money from motorists

So instead of "blatantly" extorting money from motorists there must be more subtle ways? Like pay per mile schemes maybe? Fit a GPS receiver in every car and then charge them when they drive (and monitor there whereabouts at the same time). Who would possibly want that?

BBC Breakfast had an interview with Richard George, a spokesman for Campaign for Better Transport, who said that people should have a choice of transport methods and tax revenue from cars should be used to fund public transport. Have a look at The Campaign for Better Transport's site and you'll notice they are a charity (1101929), a look at their accounts shows that for year end 2008 they declared an income of £626,419 and of that £65,311 came from Tomorrow's England and £272,266 came from NBTN who are "A Department for Transport initiative and part of the government's ACT on CO2 campaign".

Over half of The Campaign for Better Transport's income comes from 'green agenda' sources. Fair and impartial comment on the BBC again.

suspected child maltreatment guidance

NICE have published this guidance document [pdf] for parents covering the alerting features in children and young people (under 18 years) of physical, sexual and emotional abuse, neglect and fabricated or induced illness. I was alerted to it's presence by wh00ps who has found the version released for health professionals[pdf]. It's worth downloading both to compare the differences between them.

A couple of things stand out from a first skim through.

Be aware that sexual intercourse with a child younger than 13 years is unlawful and therefore pregnancy in such a child means the child has been maltreated.

I thought that intercourse with a child under 16 was unlawful?

Consider neglect if parents or carers persistently fail to engage with relevant child health promotion programmes which include:
• immunisation

So .. .. .. if you are scared of the MMR jab (for whatever reason) and have held off from immunisation then you can now be classed as neglecting your child.

the national pandemic flu service

From the BBC:

What is the flu service for?
The flu line is a phone and internet service.
It uses a checklist to diagnose whether people have swine flu and can then give them access to anti-flu drugs if necessary.

So to add to the list of society by checklist we now have diagnosis by checklist followed by prescriptions written by call centre staff. There are some serious questions being raised about the safety, advisability and effectiveness of prescribing Tamiflu to large sections of the population as well as remote diagnosis by checklist here.

Does this mean it has been rushed out?
Yes. Officials say it is only the interim version, not the "all-singing, all dancing" one that will be in place by the autumn.

And things that are rushed tend to be as well thought out as those that have been considered for a long time, with all of the potential pitfalls investigated?

Won't it be open to abuse?
Sir Liam Donaldson, the chief medical officer, has admitted people will be able to cheat the system.
It will not be long before the "correct" answers that will get people anti-viral drugs will appear on the internet somewhere.
However, the government accepts this is a price worth paying for relieving the pressure on the health service.
Sir Liam says he believes it will only be a "minority" of people who abuse the system.
There are also safeguards in place. Everyone in the country has a unique flu number so, if they try to get anti-virals more than once, the NHS will know.

We all have a unique flu number? I don't recall ever being told mine. Will the NHS force those who haven't asked for Tamiflu to take it (for their own good, obviously)? And if I have swine flu and want Tamiflu but get the answers to the checklist 'wrong' .. .. .. .. It's a headline just waiting to happen.

Why does it only cover England?
Also, GPs in all three nations (Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland) do not tend to have such large patient lists as in England, leaving them more able to cope with fluctuating demand.

So all that money that Gordon keeps on boasting about pumping into the NHS is helping patients in every country of the United Kingdom see a GP quickly. Except in England. Thanks Gordon.

going out on a limb

Tom Harris has written today

The best — the only — way of beating poverty is through work. And only by inculcating a new work ethic in our children can we break the generational cycle of benefit dependancy.

I disagree. It may well be one tool in reducing the disparity in attitude between the working and the benefit dependent but it isn't the only answer.

Elby The Beserk refers in the comments to generational benefit dependency. There are more than a few examples of families who through grandfather, father and son have never had a job and lived their entire lives supported solely by benefit handouts and it is my belief that stopping this situation is the key to the problem.

The problem as I see it is that there are too many people who believe that motherhood is the right of every woman and that consequences do not always follow on from actions. The overwhelming message of the last 12 years is the one that Helen Lovejoy is most well known for.

To me the solution is straightforward although it may seem brutal to some. If you are entirely benefit dependent then you cannot have children. If your only income is from the state and you become pregnant then you have a choice to make - keep the baby or keep the benefits. I don't really care which one you choose. To create another life that is entirely dependent on benefits is unfair on all of those who are paying for it. We need a shift of perspective to instil a belief and understanding of actions and consequences. All the while other people are left picking up the bill for the actions of the generational benefit dependent families then they will continue to reproduce and the cycle will start over again.

The benefit system should be there to support those who need assistance because of unforeseen changes in their circumstances, not to fund the starting of another generation of dependency. The only way to stop this from recurring is to stop funding it.

dame kelly holmes and me .. .. ..

Not the salacious story that you were possibly hoping for unfortunately but, thanks to JuliaM over at Ambush Predator, a link to an article in the Daily Mail from the double Olympic champion. In it she says things that I have firmly believed for some time

The double Olympic champion and former Army physical training instructor blamed a culture of political correctness for making 'competitiveness' a dirty word.

Dame Kelly has criticised established policies that continue to allow health and safety concerns to ride roughshod over sporting rivalry.

The 39-year-old former middle distance athlete said: 'Too often, in these politically sensitive times, it seems that competitiveness is seen as a dirty word.

'I was surprised by how many schools I came across where sports day had been abandoned. It's very important to learn how to lose.

'What you should do is pick yourself up, dust yourself down and start all over again. If everyone gets a prize, where on earth is the incentive to push yourself to do better next time?'

All we need now is a politician to listen .. .. ..

adhd crossing

This evening at work I was chatting to the partner of one of my ex-staff. Like me they are Wii owners and one of the games that his mrs is fond of is Animal Crossing. She has spent months getting her town developed, months of repetitive weeding, bug catching, immersing herself in the game. All was well in her video game world.

Then.

This weekend just gone her nephew came to stay. Her nephew has ADHD. He too likes video games and asked if he could play with their Wii. He started it up and started playing Animal Crossing .. .. .. ..

About an hour later as they wandered past where he was playing they had a double take moment at the state of the town. ALL of the trees were gone. Vanished. No more. A little upset at having her months of hard work undone in 60 minutes she asked what had happened. Her nephew explained that he'd gone up to the first tree, given it a shake and money had fallen out so he repeated the process around every tree in the town.

She looked at him, then at the screen, then back to him again.

"Didn't you realise you were carrying the axe?"

silly week

More information here.

stats, vanity and maths

Whilst browsing through the stats for the blog I noticed I'm still generating a number of hits from search engines from the phrase "tango with added tango" so I looked at google .. .. .. 4th hit out of 77,300,000 isn't bad!

A couple of hits down is this post from Marketing P&I which says about the Britvic campaign

The campaign runs on packs on new 440ml ‘with added Tango' packs of Tango, which are 25% bigger than regular cans of the drink.

Regular Tango cans are 330ml and Tango with added Tango cans are 440ml. I would have instinctively described the promotional cans as being 33%, not 25%, bigger. Am I mistaken yet again or can I avoid signing up to remedial maths?

social mobility

BBC news has been running pieces all morning about the lack of social mobility that exists and the ways that the government can change that situation. I was unfortunate enough to catch Polly spouting on on behalf of the Social Mobility Foundation an organisation that has fakecharity written all over it. Page 4 of their accounts[pdf] says

The principle source of income was projects income from DIUS.

Well how much is that? Of a total of £284,619 income £46,724 was voluntarily given, with an additional £1,410 gift aid payment, and the rest (£236,335) was project income from DIUS (p11).

So who would they help? Page 3 of their accounts has this:

(i) to consider for admission to programmes administered by the charity only students who are in receipt of Education Maintenance Allowance or Free School Meals,

Putting that together you get a fakecharity that receives over 80% of it's funds from the government to help students, that are already being funded by the government, become people like Polly.

smoking health warning

Smoking abstinence? Hmmmmmm

labour election flyer

You think it's a little far fetched?

nissan to create hundreds of jobs

.. .. .. screams the BBC headline.

Nissan has announced that its Wearside factory will start producing batteries for electric cars, which is expected to create 350 new jobs. Prime Minister Gordon Brown said that Nissan's £200m investment "was great news for the local economy". The plant, near Sunderland, has beaten off competition from other Nissan factories in Europe for the investment. The move could pave the way for the production of electric vehicles at the North East plant in the near future. "Sunderland could now be a strong contender to produce electric vehicles for Nissan in Europe, and we will continue to work with Nissan to ensure this happens," the prime minister said.

Mr Brown visited the Sunderland factory along with Business Secretary Lord Mandelson.

*Waits for the Curse of Jonah Brown to kick in*

threat reduced

The BBC is reporting that the threat level indicator of a terrorist attack, set by the Joint Terrorism Analysis Centre (JTAC), has been reduced from 'severe' to 'substantial'. But what does that mean? I followed a few links and found a list on the Home Office site of the different threat indicators. They are

*critical - an attack is expected imminently
*severe - an attack is highly likely
*substantial - an attack is a strong possibility
*moderate - an attack is possible but not likely
*low - an attack is unlikely

The list seems set up to encourage fear of attack from the wording used both as the desriptor of the threat level but also in the description of the level of threat. Three out of five of the levels are "we are going to be attacked", the fourth still has the fear first.

The timing of this drop of threat to our safety meshing neatly with parliament rising for the summer is obviously completely coincidental.

those top gear car doors in full

During tonight's episode of Top Gear the presenters took rear wheel drive cars costing £1500 into France for a series of challenges. They ended up at an ice race track in Val Thorens and as part of their preparations put fake advertising decals on their cars. When the doors were opened the messages read as follows

Clarkson: phart and Les Bien Hat


Hammond: norks and merde


May: Coq and tit tree



I laughed like a lunatic. Yes I know it's childish but I still laughed.

new calls for charges to see a doctor

The Social Market Foundation, a think tank that receives funding from a number of different government departments[pdf], has called for a charge of £20 if we want to visit a GP to help with the tough financial times over the next few years.

With the swine flu pandemic increasing the number of people wanting to see a doctor who else gets the feeling the timing of this is a touch insensitive?

swine flu tips for mothers-to-be

The BBC is reporting that the government are advising that

Expectant mothers and parents with children under five are being advised to avoid crowds and unnecessary travel to reduce the risk of swine flu.

So ladies, no going to those ante-natal appointments in hospitals then.

handy online indicator

This arrived via email today.

email privacy

I received a request for help last night via email from a stranger. They fired off a question in the vague hope that I might be able to help them access some sites that they were having difficulty viewing and I hope that my reply has helped a little in tracking down the cause of their frustration.

Even though the person signed their email with a single letter the mail reader that I, like many people use, gets the name that they use for their account and places it in the 'from' column of my inbox.

I have a number of email accounts that I use for different things. The account that I use to keep in contact with friends and family members, the account for signing up for internet things, the account for my internet contacts, the accounts for this blog. Only one of them actually has my name in the name fields of the account to try to preserve my privacy a little (you can probably guess which one).

In this interconnected web2.0 age it may seem odd that I want to remain anonymous (after all I'm writing a blog!) and increasing pressure is being applied by some of my internet friends for me to engage in *new* and *exciting* forms of interaction that I'm not sure that I want to be involved with.


Anyway, if you have any questions that you think I might be able to help with, or you have issue with something on the site, then the email address is over there on the right somewhere. If you don't want people to know your name when sending random emails then change the name on your account.

firefox 3.5.1

I switched to Firefox 3.5 just before the upgrade to 3.5.1 happened. I'm now back to using 3.0.11 as 3.5.1 seems painfully slow in comparison. Is it just me?

mobile phone insurance

Mrsff has a Sony Ericsson W580i handset on T-Mobile. When she signed up to the contract the salesperson in the T-Mobile shop persuaded her to take out insurance for her handset, at £7 per month, to cover herself for every eventuality. For a while now the speaker on her 'Walkman' phone has not been working which has made the phone less practical. This week the buttons on the keypad cracked rendering the phone almost useless. She contacted T-Mobile who said that she would need to contact the insurer. The insurer have offered to repair the phone if she posts it to them at her own expense. It could take 10 working days to assess and repair.

I personally know of two other cases of this model of phone having exactly the same problems of broken keys. A quick search of the internet throws up many more examples of exactly the same thing. The Sony Ericsson W850i seems to have a design flaw, or a manufacturing fault, that causes the keys to break. My advice would be to avoid this handset.

T-Mobile's mobile phone insurance sold when you take out a contract will leave you without a handset should you need to claim for a repair. Mrsff has paid at least £91 in insurance premiums for her handset so far and faces having to purchase a replacement handset while her defective one is repaired. I'd like to say "I told her not to pay for insurance" (I did) but that won't help her at this point. If you are about to sign a contract for a new mobile phone with T-Mobile don't bother with the insurance policy as it is not worth having.

T-Mobile have not only lost a customer as when her contract finishes she will not be staying with them but also I won't use them and neither will the juniorffs thanks to their fantastic customer service. Well done T-Mobile. Cunts.

july 23rd candidate list

Peter Baggs (Independent)

Thomas Burridge (Libertarian Party)

Anne Fryatt (None of The Above Party)

Bill Holden (Independent)

Laud Howling (The Official Monster Raving Loony Party)

Craig Murray (Put An Honest Man into Parliament)

Chris Ostrowski (Labour)

April Pond (Liberal Democrat)

Rupert Read (Green)

Chloe Smith (Conservative)

Glenn Tingle (UK Independence Party)

Robert West (British National Party)

a video game review

I found a review of a video game that made me laugh, cry, get angry and shake my head in amazement. Over at Game Hacks Willie Jefferson has produced a page of tripe worth reading just because you can. Choice sections of this hand wringing drivel include

I've even run over some grannies in GTA. (by accident) However, put me in a position where I have to play as a real-life enemy - in a game - and I may end up dropping the controller.

The game that really inspired this blog entry was Ubisoft's "Call of Juarez: Bound in Blood." The game starts out with players assuming the role of Ray, a Confederate officer, working to save his brother, Thomas, who's pinned down by Union soldiers. I nearly dropped the controller. I have so much respect for President Lincoln -- he wanted to preserve the Union and ended up freeing the slaves -- and have just as much respect for the Union Army.

However, the Confederacy, as far as I am concerned, wanted to keep their cheap slave labor and the like. I can not stand the Confederate flag -- I resist the urge to burn every last one that I see. To me, the flag represents hate -- and offends me and many others to no end. And to play a game, where I don't have a choice to be on the losing side -- and one I detest -- made me wonder how much research Ubisoft did for this game.

So when you bought the game did you not bother to read the back of the box? I don't know which I find more laughable .. .. that you don't mind shooting animated representations of Confederate soldiers but you do mind shooting animated representations of Union soldiers, or that diddums doesn't want to be on the losing side? Moving on we get to the classic

However, I am disturbed by the growing trend of racist undertones that are cropping up in video games.

One of the games that comes to mind is "Left 4 Dead 2." Though the game isn't out yet, it's already causing an uproar. Set in New Orleans, players will have to fight their way through hordes of zombies - with several of them who appear to be African-Americans.

Several? As in a minority of? Which means that the majority of the zombies were white (obviously it's ok to dispatch white zombies). How the fuck does having "several" black zombies among "hordes of zombies" make this racist? I'd ask if you wanted a better representation of blacks in the zombie count (purely in the interests of equality) but it seems that that isn't your concern as you go on to complain about the dispatching of black zombies in a game set in Africa.

bedtime stories

As a treat for juniorff3 I took him to the beer garden of the local pub to read his bed time story tonight. No, really it was his treat. Mrsff had taken the other juniorff's to see the new Harry Potter film and to stop him from feeling left out I forced myself to take him to the pub. And drink a pint of Crop Circle. The sacrifices we make for our kids eh?

vocational training

Does anyone want a beer?

end of term party passes without trouble

Ambush Predator would like to draw your attention to this article in todays Daily Mail online about how a legally elected representative of the GLA attended a garden party at Buckingham Palace last week that did not end in tragedy. Richard Barnbrook, the elected BNP member of the council had been scheduled to attend the party on the 21st of July but instead went to one two weeks earlier. I had to laugh at the quote from a 'representative' of Searchlight (unelected pressure group)

'On a positive note, it appears Barnbrook has been sidelined by the BNP who clearly decided their attempts to make political capital out of the invitation in the first place backfired so heavily on them.'

Erm, Mr, Mrs, Ms or Miss Searchlight representative, who was it trying to make political capital out of the event? The whole fuss over whether or not Richard Barnbrook was going to invite Nick Griffin to the party seems a little contrived when you consider this quote from Barnbrook

'I was happy not to bring Nick after being asked but the irony of the whole debacle was that, as he won a seat in the European Elections last month, he is due to be invited to dinner with the Queen anyway.'

So, the fearfully nasty Nick Griffin is to be invited to dine with the queen? Quick! Stage a protest!

the ex-headmaster's wife

Sad news indeed on this last day of term. It seems that the ex-headmaster's wife may be suffering from swine flu. We would like to take this opportunity to wish her a speedy recovery.

Except we can't do so in good conscience because that would be hypocritical.

So here is a picture we made instead.

schools need more places

This BBC story about a lack of primary school places has me undecided whether to laugh or cry (or both). 18 months ago my local LEA decided to rationalise the primary school places to bring it in line with national policy. Until then the school system had been organised along the first, midddle and secondary lines but after the shake up there are only primary and secondary schools. I've got no real problem with that except as part of the changeover they reduced the number of intake places in the area as there was a falling number of applicants. Except there isn't.

According to Ed Balls

"Birth rate has been rising nationally since 2001 and the government has already specifically made available funding to deal with projected pupil growth. While it is clear that some local authorities simply did not plan or budget effectively for how rising birth rates would affect them locally, others are facing exceptional, unanticipated rises in demand for reception-age pupils over the next few years because of a combination of much localised circumstances."

Add onto that the new housing being built on reclaimed brownfield sites in the area and it adds up to a profound shortage of places for reception and year 1 students.

One of my neighbours used to be a governor of a local school. We were talking in the pub one night (back in the smoke age) about the planned changes and he told us that the projected number of school places needed for families living in the new housing developments in the area was zero.

Taking the figure for school entry of approx 700,000 students from the DCSF statistical breakdown[pdf] and James May's 28 million households in Britain fact (untested) I worked out that each home provides an average of 0.025 students to start their schooling each year.

Multiply 0.025 by the 700 new homes built in my area over the last few years and you'll need 17 or 18 extra primary school places per year. Or just over half a class worth. And my local LEA has reduced the number of places.

last day of term high-jinks

William Hague causes mirth on the last day before the summer holidays



cat tip to guido

busy day at school today

Written Ministerial Statements to be made today
1 Minister of State, Department for Business, Innovation and Skills: Post Council Written Statement: Informal meeting of employment and social policy Ministers in Jonköping, Sweden, 8-9 July 2009.
2 Mr Chancellor of the Exchequer: Ecofin 7 July 2009.
3 Mr Chancellor of the Exchequer: Economic and Financial Affairs Council (Budget Ecofin): 10 July 2009.
4 Mr Chancellor of the Exchequer: Provisional outturn for public expenditure in 2008-09.
5 Mr Chancellor of the Exchequer: Tax Law Rewrite Project.
6 Mr Chancellor of the Exchequer: Taxation of gaming machines: Consultation on a gross profits tax.
7 Mr Chancellor of the Exchequer: Walker Review of bank governance.
8 Minister for the Cabinet Office: Cabinet Office Annual Report and Accounts 2008-09.
9 Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government: Gypsies and Travellers.
10 Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government: Thames Gateway Annual Report 2008-09.
11 Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government: Eco-towns and zero carbon homes.
12 Secretary of State for Defence: BORONA Programme.
13 Secretary of State for Defence: Defence Estate Development Plan 2009.
14 Secretary of State for Defence: Science Advisory Committee on the Medical Implications of Less Lethal Weapons.
15 Secretary of State for Defence: Service Personnel Command Green Paper.
16 Secretary of State for the Environment, Food and Rural Affairs: Arrangements for consulting on the principle of direct elections to the English National Park and Broads Authorities.
17 Secretary of State for the Environment, Food and Rural Affairs: Performance targets set for the Rural Payments Agency for 2009-10.
18 Secretary of State for the Environment, Food and Rural Affairs: Review of the Royal Botanic Gardens, Kew.
19 Secretary of State for the Environment, Food and Rural Affairs: Annual review of controls on imports of animal products.
20 Secretary of State for the Environment, Food and Rural Affairs: Single payment scheme.
21 Secretary of State for the Home Department: Appointment of the next Deputy Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police.
22 Secretary of State for the Home Department: Consultation to support charging for new services and products.
23 Secretary of State for the Home Department: Identity and Passport Service – Annual Report and Accounts 2008-09.
24 Secretary of State for the Home Department: Independent Police Complaints Commission Annual Report 2008-09.
25 Secretary of State for the Home Department: Intercept as evidence.
26 Secretary of State for the Home Department: Independent Safeguarding Authority Annual Report and Accounts.
27 Secretary of State for International Development: Department for International Development (Annual Report and Resource Accounts 2008-09).
28 Secretary of State for Justice: Government Response to the Law Commission’s Report on Housing: proportionate dispute resolution.
29 Secretary of State for Justice: Implementation of the Tribunals, Courts and Enforcement Act 2007.
30 Secretary of State for Justice: Legal Aid Reform: Refocusing on Priority Cases.
31 Secretary of State for Justice: Penalty Notice for Disorder Scheme — Guidance on retail theft and criminal damage.
32 Secretary of State for Justice: Freedom of Information Act and records management.
33 Leader of the House: State Opening of Parliament.
34 Secretary of State for Northern Ireland: Northern Ireland Prison Service Annual Report and Accounts 2008-09.
35 Prime Minister: Ministerial gifts 2008-09.
36 Prime Minister: Ministerial travel 2008-09.
37 Prime Minister: Official and charity receptions: 10 Downing Street.
38 Prime Minister: Official hospitality Chequers.
39 Prime Minister: Special advisers.
40 Prime Minister: UK visits 2008-09 made by the Prime Minister.
41 Prime Minister: Advisory Committee on Business Appointments Tenth Report (2008-09).
42 Prime Minister: Annual Reports of the Surveillance Commissioner, Interception of Communications Commissioner and Intelligence Services Commissioner.
43 Prime Minister: The Road to 2010: Addressing the Nuclear Question in the 21st Century.
44 Minister of State, Department for Transport: Cost of ministerial cars for 2008-09.
45 Minister of State, Department for Transport: Crossrail: Annual update.
46 Minister of State, Department for Transport: Department for Transport Annual Report and Resource Accounts 2008-09.
47 Minister of State, Department for Transport: Highways Agency Framework Document.
48 Minister of State, Department for Transport: Local Transport Act 2008: bus passenger champion.
49 Minister of State, Department for Transport: Local Transport Act 2008—review of designated bodies for Section 19 permits.
50 Minister of State, Department for Transport: ATOL protection contribution.
51 Secretary of State for Work and Pensions: Annual Social Fund reports 2008-09.
52 Secretary of State for Work and Pensions: ICL Inquiry Report.
53 Secretary of State for Work and Pensions: Annual Reports and Accounts for the Department for Work and Pensions, the Rent Service and the Child Maintenance and Enforcement Commission.


Ministers needn't worry though .. .. .. we've got 82 days to read through everything and we'll have questions when they return to Parliament in the autumn .. .. ..

A cat tip to LOBBYDOG for pointing this out.

the most expensive packet of fags in the world

From the BBC:

A man in the United States popped out to his local petrol station to buy a pack of cigarettes - only to find his card charged $23,148,855,308,184,500.

OUCH!

the gordfalter

You never know when a pre-prepared image will come in handy!

tamiflu and swineflu

A couple of posts about Tamiflu over at NHS Blog Doctor, and the link from there to another doctor's post about Tamiflu got me to thinking. Who is pushing Tamiflu as the solution harder, Gordon Brown or David Cameron, who has the most political capital invested in the Tamiflu solution?

For a simple test I visited Hansard for a review of PMQs.. .. .. .. The exchange on the 29th April 09 is the most memorable between Cameron and Brown and it went like this (column 858-860):

Mr. David Cameron (Witney) (Con):The whole House will share the Prime Minister’s concern about the cases of swine flu and what he has just said, and the whole House will also welcome the steps that the Prime Minister and the Government are taking. May I ask a number of specific questions? First, may I ask about the national flu line? That was supposed to be up and running already, but instead we are currently told, I believe, that it will not be operational until the autumn. Given the importance of making sure that information is available for people, can the Prime Minister tell us what the Government are doing to speed that up?

The Prime Minister: Yes, I am very grateful for the opportunity to explain that, and to thank the right hon. Gentleman for what he has said about both our best wishes for those who are affected by the flu and the preparations that we are making to deal with the problems that arise from it. I can say about the flu line that interim arrangements are being made. We signed a contract with BT last year. It is not simply an information line; it is about the availability and distribution of antivirals to people in the country. If that is necessary, that will be done, and we have made arrangements so that that can be done, but of course over the longer term we want to create the flu line, which is to be brought into being when it is necessary. I have to say that the circumstances in which it would be used are not yet reached, and we hope that they will not be reached, but arrangements have been made. If I may say so, the Health Secretary will make a fuller statement to the House this evening about those very issues.

Mr. Cameron: I am grateful for that answer. Clearly, everyone will be concerned that without a flu line, there is a danger that NHS Direct could be swamped.

There are two further issues on preparedness that I would like to ask about. First, the Prime Minister said that the Government are ordering more stocks of antivirals. Currently, those stocks cover half the population. The Government have accepted that it would be useful to have antivirals not just for treatment, but for prevention. He gave some figures earlier; could he tell us the time scale for getting up to those figures, and what percentage of the population would then be covered?

The second issue is about face masks; again, the Prime Minister mentioned it. My hon. Friend the hon. Member for South Cambridgeshire (Mr. Lansley), the shadow Secretary of State for Health, has, I believe, raised the matter 15 times in the last four years. The Health Secretary said on Monday that the Government have not yet done enough. Again, could we have a time scale on the issue of face masks as well?

The Prime Minister: I am grateful, again, for the right hon. Gentleman’s questions about this, because it allows me to explain to the public everything that is being done, and everything that we intend to do. As far as the antivirals are concerned, we are increasing our order from the 35 million that we now have to 50 million. These are brought into use, normally, only where symptoms of the flu are discovered, so we feel that we are well prepared at the moment, but it is right to increase the coverage of the population, and of course it is right to help national health service staff who may be exposed to the flu.

As far as face masks are concerned, let me say that there are large numbers in stock but we have got to do more, and we have now ordered, and are ordering, several million more masks. These orders will come in over the next few days and weeks, and we are determined

to have what is necessary. May I say, so that there is no confusion on this, that the face masks are what are necessary for the NHS staff? The guidance that has been given by the chief medical officer about what the public can do, and the guidance that we will send out in the information note from next week—it will be on the website a lot earlier—will not refer to a need for the public to have such a face mask. This is for NHS staff who are in circumstances where they come up to people who are perhaps facing, or suffering from, that flu. That is what the face masks are for. I hope that there will be no doubt in the public’s mind that the advice given by the chief medical officer over the last few days about how people can best prevent the flu and prepare themselves for it is the advice that we stand by, and the Health Secretary will reinforce that this evening.

Mr. Cameron: May I thank the Prime Minister for that answer and that information? I am sure that at this time, the whole country and the whole House of Commons will want to wish the staff of our national health service well in what may be difficult days ahead.

And the answer as to who is pushing harder? Neither or both, take your pick. The evidence from the GPs who are talking about Tamiflu in public is neither reassuring or particularly positive and it seems that, at least in the case of swine flu, this is an example of both political parties pushing for a solution so that they can be seen to be doing something, rather than because it is the right thing to do.

UPDATE: Bloomberg carried a report last week that there have been strains of swineflu that are resistant to Tamiflu found in three separate locations around the world. But if Tamiflu doesn't actually work against swine flu then .. .. .. ??

b'eau-pal

I discovered this new and expensive designer water that looks great but you might not want to drink it.

golden ropetackle ale

I'm no expert but I know what I like and this I like! Bottle conditioned (so pour carefully) it came out a little cloudy with a deep golden colour, a subtle fragrance rising from the memory laden testing glass as I moved to the specified testing area. This lower strength ale (3.4%) is subtly flavoured starting with some sweetness on the tongue offset by a pleasant hoppy dryness as that fades. Fuller bodied than, say, Summer Lightning it is a very easy drinking pleasurable experience without the disappointing metallic after taste that can be found in some bottled ales.

Highly recommended.

con artist

Over on Rob Manuel's blog is the tale of how he got scammed out of £10 by this lady. Well worth the read if you have a few moments spare.

tonight i will mainly be .. .. ..

product testing!

swearing is a good thing

According to research (subscription required to read it, which I don't have, so I'm relying on a Keele University press release)

Uttering expletives when you hurt yourself is a sensible policy, according to scientists who have shown swearing can help reduce pain. A study by Keele University researchers found volunteers who cursed at will could endure pain nearly 50% longer than civil-tongued peers. They believe swearing helps us downplay being hurt in favour of a more pain-tolerant machismo.

Well fuck me that's great fucking news!

educational filtering software fails to filter

The BBC is carrying an advertisement for E-Safe Education this morning with a scare story about filtering software in schools. Apparently

School computer systems in the UK are failing to identify 10% of incoming harmful content, research suggests. Data monitored from 30,000 students found content from items such as mobile phones and cameras which had not been picked up by filter systems. Researchers from online safety firm, E-Safe Education, say children are still able to access inappropriate content.

The government's technology agency for schools, Becta, said systems were tackling this "real problem".

Students' data was monitored by E-Safe Education, checking how much inappropriate content was evading the schools' usual blocking and filter systems. The firm's managing director, Colin McKeown, said: "A lot of schools have internet filtering, but they may just filter words and text. We are seeing a new generation of multimedia content and images downloaded from mobile phones, pen drives and CDs and DVDs which do not always have words attached."

A few things spring to mind from reading this adverticle and none of them are particularly complimentary. Starting with the 'research' one has to wonder if the students were asked for consent before the snooping began.

Then we have the question of the existing filters being keyword only, and is that really appropriate for a generation that has more technological nous than the people installing the filters? How many people actually name their hardcore porn as hardcore porn? OK, I admit that google might need terms like that but even the most technophobic teenager knows that a parent/teacher is going to question a folder marked hardcore anal sex*.


Finally, looking at the E-Safe Education pitch the software they are promoting seems, to put not too fine a point on it, invasive as it offers these features : Web address and keyword monitoring, Filter/Firewall bypass protection, Customisable image control, Protection from USB devices, Offline protection, Double protection with browser based blocking - key for effectively blocking social networks and online chat, Protection systems can be extended for home use. Why would students agree to that kind of intrusion into their personal, private lives? What they do outside of their educational establishment is absolutely nothing to do with the school / college.










*I just ran that past mrsff and she agrees. She's not the most tecchy member of the family but she wouldn't call her porn 'porn', she said she'd call it 'games'.. .. .. .. If she had one.. .. .. .. Which she doesn't.. .. .. Obviously

tango with added tango (3)

I finally found them in stock at the wholesaler that I use.

joined up government

We all know that this governments left hand doesn't seem to know what its right hand is doing but these two stories, found one underneath each other on page 2 of todays Sun, highlight the problem.

First, echoing the interview from The Andrew Marr Show yesterday, we have the Climate Secretary Ed Miliband who was asked about a figure of £230 per family per year that his 'green agenda' would cost

"I think there are upward pressures on energy prices whatever route we go down."

"There are upward pressures on prices, yes … [interrupted]… and my job, as I say, is to counter them: stronger regulation, giving people a chance in terms of energy efficiency and giving them the right help to do that. And also helping the most vulnerable and that's what I'll be talking about next week."

Then we have the report from The Fuel Poverty Advisory Group (FPAG) that says around 4 million homes are already in fuel poverty.

One of the key causes of fuel poverty is high energy prices. Average domestic fuel bills have increased by 125% over the past five years.

Of course it then goes on to call on the government to "do much more to help the most vulnerable households." Fuck the rest of us then?


I have a simpler solution. Drop all 'green' taxes and reduce the cost of fuel. Stop giving AGW as a reason for increasing tax on fuel, telling us it's to make us use less, then tell us that vulnerable people can't afford to pay for fuel. See? Simple.

another sperm story

With all of the comment about the artificially created sperm you may have missed this gem reported in The Sun a couple of days ago.

A WOMAN is suing an Egyptian hotel claiming her daughter got pregnant - from using the swimming pool. Magdalena Kwiatkowska's 13-year-old returned to Poland from their holiday expecting a baby. Magdalena believes the teenager conceived from stray sperm after taking a dip in the hotel's mixed pool. She is now seeking compensation from the hotel.

A travel industry source said: "The mother is adamant that her daughter didn't meet any boys while she was there. She is determined to go ahead with the case."

Tourist authorities in Warsaw, Poland, have confirmed they received the bizarre complaint.

A few of questions spring to mind.

1) How old does the daughter look?
2) Where in the world are there single sex swimming pools?
3) I'm no expert but last time I checked a hotel is incapable of procreating so how is she able to sue the hotel for her daughter's pregnancy?

throwing litter? have points on your driving licence

The Keep Britain Tidy campaign has come up with an idea to add points to the licence of drivers if rubbish is thrown out of their car the BBC reports.

Keep Britain Tidy says its research has shown it is a better deterrent than fines, which are already handed out. It argues that as it is difficult to identify who has actually thrown the litter, all the blame should fall on the car owner. Phil Barton, the organisation's chief executive, said it should be easier to prosecute offenders who use the streets and roads as a "giant dumping ground". "The owner should be responsible for the actions of those inside the car," he said."We therefore want the law to go further and see a penalty point put on the licence of those that litter from vehicles."

Forgive me if I'm wrong but doesn't the driving licence show that you are a safe driver and therefore eligible to be driving, not whether you are a litterbug. Whatever next? Points on your licence if you drink alcohol, smoke or are overweight?

I agree that rubbish is unsightly, unpleasant and it is unnecessary to throw it from a car, but giving drivers points for it? No.

QT 9 July 9

The young person's edition turned up the usual clichés from "we don't have anything to do" to "we need more money to be spent on yoof services".

And that was from an audience that was made up mainly from university students.

Calls for higher charges on alcohol and demands for the government to do something about the problem made this one of the worst editions of the show that I've seen.

Why wasn't the local sitting MP on the show in Salford?

consumer focus, ofcom and the BBC

The BBC is carrying a report today that OFCOM is highlighting the gaps in 3G mobile phone coverage. A few quotes from OFCOM followed by a few quotes from Consumer Focus welcoming the comments from OFCOM.

One publicly funded body with a story from another publicly funded body with comments from a third publicly funded body.

Isn't it time to reduce the amount of money we spend on all three?

I had a look at some pdf files .. .. .. this one from OFCOM and this one from Consumer Focus. Both are related to mobile phones and broadband access and both promote the idea that subsidising the cost of broadband access and computers for certain sections of the population is a good thing to do. The Consumer Focus one was particularly patronising with comments like this one (case study, page 12)

We don’t know whether she has a 3G
mobile phone or a laptop but it seems
likely that unless someone gave her
working equipment, along with advice
and support, she is ‘digitally
excluded’. She might not worry about
this because she has more than
enough to deal with. On the other
hand if she was digitally included, it
might be easier for her check that she
and her husband are receiving all of
their social security benefit
entitlements; to understand more
about her husband’s medical
condition; to check whether there’s a
local carers’ support group; to see
whether there’s any possibility of
having an affordable week’s holiday.

which highlights the mentality of the writers of the report. Benefits and support groups. Why didn't they mention the reason that 95% of people got broadband (porn)?

Firefox 3

I'm not normally a fan of change but I gave in and downloaded Firefox 3. Up until today I've been using Firefox 2 and the improvement in load times is astonishing. I also downloaded firefox 3.5 but I can't bring myself to use it yet.. .. .. give me time and I'll get there eventually.

teenage pregnancy

The BBC is reporting the results of the Young People's Development Program (YPDP) which was an NHS funded attempt, via the National Youth Agency, to reduce the number of pregnancies in vulnerable teenagers. £5.9 million was spent on this project between 2004 and 2007 and the results [pdf] are available.

What a huge success it was. 84% of the girls in the YPDP project didn't conceive a child while still a teenager.*


Which of course means that 16% (~1 in 6) did conceive, compared to 6% (~1 in 20) of vulnerable teenagers who did not take part. 10% more girls who attended the course to reduce teen pregnancy conceived a child than those who did not attend the course.

It cost £2,500 per teenager to triple the rate of teenage pregnancies in the group that was set up to lower them.

Looking through the pdf I think I might have found part of the answer. It comes from page 12, the YPDP aims and objectives

YPDP was intended to embrace a positive approach, building on young people's
potential and involving parents and other key stakeholders in local communities.
Specific programme content was to be determined by the individual projects who
were delivering services. However the range of components offered to these at-risk
young people was expected to include:
• education (literacy, numeracy, IT, vocational skills)
• training/employment opportunities
• life skills (e.g. communication, decision-making, goal-setting, relationships, negotiation, anger-management)
• mentoring (weekly one-to-one sessions with staff)
• volunteering (both career-oriented and community-based)
• health education (particularly sexual health, substance misuse)
• arts and sports
• advice on accessing services (health, contraceptive, drug and alcohol services, welfare, benefits advice, counselling and advice, housing)

Do you think that maybe, just maybe, if you teach a group of vulnerable teenagers how to access the benefits system they might think that is a career choice?

One has to wonder who staffed these sessions. If they were women who had become mothers when they were teenagers themselves (who were there to pass on their experience and war against it) that would send a message to these young women that it was ok to get pregnant as a teenager (well you've did alrite ain't yuo miss).










*Just to be clear the BBC is reporting it as a failure, the twist is my own.

broken moral compass?

Then you need the *new* and *improved* Saintly Satnav



Inspired by Anita Anand.

digital champion

The BBC is carrying news that Martha Lane Fox, the newly appointed Digital Champion, gave her first public speech yesterday. Among the claims she made was this beauty

Those on the wrong side of the digital divide were disadvantaged in many ways. Studies showed that those familiar with the web earned more, performed better in job interviews, could save money by shopping online and had an easy route to keeping their skills fresh.

Are you sure you haven't got that all arse-about-faced Martha? Having net access isn't a stimulator of better income, of being more employable, having financial control, it's a result of it you governemnt stooge.

a little local knowledge

Iain Dale posted yesterday about the plight of a child who failed to get into his first choice of secondary school even though he only lives 350 yards outside of the catchment area, and that maybe in this case the rules should be bent to allow him to go to his first choice school. The Telegraph also has the same story with the attention grabbing headline "Taxi bill for sending boy to school to reach £80,000". The boy's parents wanted him to attend Downlands School in nearby Hassocks but instead, because of the catchment boundaries, he was allocated a place in their second choice school.

The boy in question lives in the village of Edburton. His catchment area school is Steyning Grammar School. The distance to Steyning Grammar school is approx 4 miles, the distance to Downlands is approx 8 miles. League table results for Steyning Grammar are a few percentage points better than Downlands. Personally I don't see what the fucking problem is. Boy is going to a good school that also happens to be the nearest school.

Juniorff1 is starting secondary school this autumn and we had put Steyning Grammar as our first choice of school on the admissions form and were not successful in our application (we are outside of the catchment area). Instead she must attend a previously much worse performing state school which is being transformed into an academy.

we can set you free

From G.O.T

BBC GCSE Bitesize

A guest post on OH today about the disturbing prejudice of the BBC in their educational pages for GCSE students prompted me to click on links to some revision tests, specifically these two:

Christianity - Prejudice and discrimination

Islam - Prejudice and discrimination


While I was looking at the tests I couldn't help noticing that question 6 looked rather similar in both .. .. .. but the correct answer .. .. .. well, here's some screengrabs.
First the 'christian test'
followed by the 'islam test'
and finally, for good measure, the 'sikhism test'
No wonder kids are all fucked up and dumb.

more on university places

Mark Wadsworth picked up from my previous article regarding the change in government targets for university admissions and makes an interesting observation that got me thinking again. Mark said

*I suppose on a pedantic point, you could argue that there is a difference between 50% of current school-leavers going to university (which is a year-on-year thing) and 40% of adults having had a university education (which is a far more stable variable but would be impossible to achieve, given that until a few decades ago, only five or ten per cent of people went to university), but I don't think that's how they mean it.

and the pedant in me went into overdrive! Searching the ONS site for statistics on the population breakdown I started some maths. The 2001 census gives the following breakdowns for the different age ranges in the UK and for arguments sake lets say that in the over 25 age group 10% of the population attended university, and that the population size within each age range will remain fairly constant. I realise that for the group aged 25 to 30 there may be slightly more graduates but, for this exercise, it will suffice.

Of the population then there are 40,474,576 people aged 25 or over. 10% of that total is 4,047,458. As this census was from 2001 then in 2020 the very youngest will be 19 years old and part of the adult population while we may by then, sadly, have said goodbye for the last time to anyone who was aged 70 or over. Lets do some more maths with those figures.

If we include anyone who was aged 0-69 in 2001 for an estimate of the adult population in 2020 we get a figure of 52,045,134.

40% of the 2020 adult population would be 20,818,053.

The number of potential graduates between now and then (the age ranges from 0-19 from the 2001 census) is 14,768,654.

Add in the graduates from the existing adult population 14,768,654 + 4,047,458= 18,816,112

If there is 100% entrance into university for the next 11 years there is still a shortfall of around 2 million graduates so the target is impossible to hit.

Or is there a flaw in my maths?

So I agree with Mark that the reduced figure for uni attendance must be a target for each year group rather than the population as a whole. Which returns to the question I originally asked .. .. .. when did that change?

university places

The BBC is reporting a call by Phill Willis, chairman of the Commons Education Select Committee, for extra funding to increase the number of university places on offer this year. The article also goes on to say

The government's target is for 40% of all adults in England to have a university education by 2020.

Hang on a second .. .. .. didn't the target used to be that, by 2010, 50% of students should continue on to university? When did that change? As recently as April 2008 John Denham, the Universities Secretary insisted that

meeting the target remains vital to Britain's future economic success

and in January 2009 the BBC ran a story that the Conservatives were suggesting that the 50% target could not be hit by 2010.

So why has that now been reduced in both size and timeframe, and why isn't the BBC commenting on the change of the target?