single

A decision by the Brit Award selection committee to nominate Cheryl Cole for the category of Best British Single has created a bit of a fuss. Celebrity gossip mags have exploded with activity at the news.

"We had absolutely no idea she was thinking of leaving him" said senior gossip Selina Slag. "It's brilliant news. Our circulation always lifts when a prominent celebrity couple separates and it means that Ashley is officially back in circulation. He'll shag anything with tits so I'm going to get me some premier league action!"