bigots

Bigots have reacted angrily to Gordon Brown comparing them to pensioners yesterday. The Prime Minister's unguarded comments have caused outrage amongst xenophobes up and down the country.

"We are not a bunch of enfeebled OAPs" said one senior bigot. "Most of us are young and virile humans in the prime of our lives. To ridicule us in this way on an international stage is deplorable. We will be taking our complaint to the courts to seek redress for this horrendous slur."

The Prime Minister attempted to claim that he'd said no such thing until he was confronted with the audio recording of his comments. Once he realised he couldn't continue with the denial aspect he issued an apology.

"I'm mortified" he said. "Not only because my comments were heard but also because they have been reported. I never intended that the object of my derision should be able to hear my remarks. I've been to speak to a bigot and my apology has been accepted."

"You misunderstood what I said, and you have accepted there was a misunderstanding and have accepted my apology."

"If you like, I am a penitent sinner. Sometimes I say things I don’t mean you to hear, sometimes I say things by mistake and sometimes I say things you want to correct very quickly, so I wanted to come here and say that you made a mistake and misinterpreted what I said."