freezing income tax

In an effort to stop the National Insurance row Gordon Brown have unveiled a promise to freeze Income Tax for five years if they are re-elected on May 6th. They hope to twist the taxation debate and make themselves more popular to the electorate.

Things didn't go entirely as planned as sceptical journalists started asking awkward questions about the proposals. When asked whether a total freeze would include personal tax allowances Gordon replied "The Tories want to take 6 billions of poundages out of the economic prudence and they were wrong on Toffs and they are wrong on taxationables too. Only the Labour Party can guarantee to save the recession and ringfence the NHS."

Bemused by this another journalist asked whether, just as in the previous election campaigns, the promise to leave the basic rate of income tax alone was just a cover for even more NI rises. "Any new Notional In-sewer-ants rises, other than the ones that we have already delayed, are not on the table right now" said Gordon as he lifted his briefing notes. "The Tories were wrong on the recovery position, wrong on spending, wrong on debt creation, they want to give in-terries-pants taxage breakings to their friends while removing billions of Sterlings from the Treasure chest coffers by leaving it in people's pocket calculators. They will encourage Alky Eda by fighting our minimum rage proposals. Tory Toffs vs Middle New Britain Labour is a clear choice."

The press conference came to an abrupt halt when a fire alarm sounded and the building was cleared.