sinking

In the first full day of electioneering Gordon Brown has unveiled what he will hope will form one of the central pillars of his election platform. The proposals he outlined to a select group of Labour Party activists include a pledge to introduce tough new legislation to properly regulate sinks and basins in both commercial and domestic settings.

"Gordon said we should be tough of grime and tough on the causes of grime" said one starry eyed member of the audience. "The Tories are out of touch with the people on this issue. They were wrong on the economy, wrong on jobs, wrong on taxation and now Gordon is exposing them as wrong on taps and plugholes as well."